Families across Australia are preparing for a major shift in how young people use social media, with a new minimum age requirement coming into effect on 10 December. The change, which restricts access for anyone under 16, has added another layer of concern for parents already juggling questions about screen time, privacy and online behaviour.
Parenting expert Dr Marie Yap says the anxiety many parents feel is entirely understandable. Through her work with families over 15 years, she has seen how easily conversations with teenagers can become tense, especially when they involve emotion, independence or the fast moving world of online life. “If you find having conversations with your child about contentious topics difficult and overwhelming, you’re not alone,” she says.
Dr Yap, a psychologist and migrant herself, notes that these challenges can intensify for families adjusting to a new culture. She says intergenerational differences often become sharper when parents are navigating unfamiliar expectations while children compare their home to the households of their peers. “I understand that families navigating a new culture can often encounter intergenerational conflict over parenting styles. This tension is further amplified for those moving from a collectivist culture to an individualistic one,” she explains.
For teenagers, those contrasts can feel particularly acute online. Dr Yap says it is common for young people to judge the fairness of new rules by looking at what their friends are allowed to do. She believes parents and children can find a workable balance, saying, “The key to navigating this is to find a comfortable middle ground that works for both you as the parent and your child, a sweet spot that respects the values of both your home culture and the culture your children are growing up in, here in Australia.”
With the age rule coming into force within days, Dr Yap is urging parents to approach the subject calmly and with accurate information. She says young people are especially vulnerable to misinformation online, which can affect their reactions when access is restricted. “The most important thing before having a conversation with your child about these changes, is to arm yourself with correct and credible information. Because young people are still developing their judgement and cognitive skills, they’re more vulnerable to misinformation,” she says.
She recommends that parents pause to check their own stance before raising the topic. “Before you approach the subject, be fully aware of your own stance on the change, whether you’re supportive or sceptical of it. This self-awareness is key to guiding the discussion effectively. Remember that teens are very sensitive; a judgemental or forceful tone will quickly push them away,” she notes.
A central part of her advice is to separate a teenager’s reaction from the feeling behind it. Dr Yap says strong responses are likely, especially for young people who already have active accounts. “Don’t react to the outburst. Instead, focus on validating the underlying feeling to keep the dialogue open,” she says. “Showing empathy and acknowledging their emotions at the start of the conversation is the first step to an open and constructive discussion.”
She encourages parents to understand who shapes their child’s thinking online, whether influencers, friends or peers with strong opinions. “Finding out who those key influencers are, and what they’re saying, provides valuable insight for your conversation. The key is to keep the discussion curious, open, and sincere,” she says.
Before starting the discussion, she suggests parents reflect on how they will explain that the new law is intended to protect young people’s wellbeing, how firm they plan to be if their child looks for a workaround, and what alternatives might help them stay connected socially while adjusting.
For those unsure how to begin, Dr Yap offers practical starters. Parents might ask, “Have you heard anything from your friends at school about the new social media ‘ban’?” or mention it gently by saying, “This news story just reminded me, have you heard that you’ll soon need to be 16 to have a social media account?”
She adds that it will be important to reassure teens that the rule applies to everyone, even if it feels like a personal loss. “They might feel like it’s just them missing out, but this is intended to protect them, not isolate them,” she explains. She also notes that families who rarely discuss online behaviour may find this change creates an opening for conversations that have been overdue. “The golden rule is to pause and breathe before reacting. It makes a huge difference, and creating a safe space for your child to open up benefits the whole family.”
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